不知,何去,从来。

空白。

离别。

结束。

我忘不了,可我根本不该留念。

我放不下,可我必须忘了一切。

我做不到,可我却假装放下了。

为什么我对事物总是那么重视。

为什么我就不能轻易地放下呢。

为什么我就是那么笨那么傻傻,的!

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Mambo + Bikini Bar

Ok, gotta rewind a little, back to September, after that hectic F1 period and braving the hazy conditions with Indonesia’s illegal forest fires causing the air to be packed with pollutants, I managed to have a day out suntanning in Sentosa with Yunteng at my new favourite chill out spots, Mambo Beach Club and then bringing her to my workplace, Bikini Bar.

Previously I’ve been heading to Mambo alone on my own, during my off days to chill with my book. Sometimes it gets pretty boring to find no one to talk to. But then again it’s pretty relaxing as well. A day just for myself doing nothing and chilling, looking at people and emptying my thoughts.

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Days when there’s just me, my book and the beach.

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And I even revisited this place, The most Southern Point of Singapore at Palawan Beach.

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So here’s the drinks menu if anyone is interested.

The reason why I visited bars in Sentosa for drinks is because I get 15% discount due to my Island Partner Card (staff benefit for working in Sentosa hurhur, and I get free unlimited monorail entries.)

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We ordered the Mambo Sunset which is Mambo’s version of Tequila Sunset, which consist of vodka, blue curacao syrup, grenadine syrup and pineapple juice. This drink is so instagram-worthy because it’s nicely layered and looks like a rainbow cocktail which will make your day as cheery like the colors!

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I stirred my glass of cocktail and the colour changed…

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Tadaa, it became an eery and dull cocktail haha!

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Rainbow cocktails really brighten up the hazy afternoon!

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And a flying kiss from me…KIDDING xD

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Yunteng didn’t had lunch before she came, so she ordered beer batter seabass with salad and chips. Premium fish meat that they use for the fish & chip, they were GOOD!

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Ok, so this is what happens when you have a friend who have to take photo of the food before eating, and there’s ME the one who can’t wait and have to pop a strand of crispy fries into my mouth! Haha 😀

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Subsequently, I was hungry and ordered this huge bowl of truffle fries and my favourite deep fried baby squid.

I have been addicted to squid lately and everywhere I go I need to have squid in my meal.

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And I ordered a Passion Fruit Caipirinha for myself.

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And a Sex on the Beach thereafter! This one was strong and I felt alittle happy tipsy after finishing this. OOPS!

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After our meal, I went to suntan with a huge tummy, and we sat on the tanning chairs, chatting…

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In the jacuzzi under the hot sun, it feels so warm and comfy!

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After the jacuzzi, we headed to the main pool! Yunteng didn’t bring her swimwear, what a waste!

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A mandatory poolside bar photo!

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And that’s me with my unkempt soaked hair.

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The cabana is pretty relaxing actually, comfy cushioned seats to laid there and read a book!

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And she took this while I was trying to take a rest…

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After Mambo, we were at Bikini Bar!

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I ordered a Peach Margarita for myself and she had a Strawberry Margarita.

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But my favourite is still Lychee Margarita!

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And Bikini Bar’s calamari ring is still the best! Crispy and chewy, I totally love those hint of lemon zest amidst the batter! YUM

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To end our night, we went for the skyline luge attraction to end our day on a high note!

GUESS WHAT? Perks of working in Sentosa, and having Luge manager as the bar’s regular, complimentary luge tickets!

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Our first time on board the luge together!

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With our helmets on! HAHA

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I didn’t managed to take photos with Yunteng on the skyline ride because it was way too dark, so I shall make do with the one I took by myself when I went for the ride alone previously in the early evening.

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It was a really awesome afternoon that day, and although I may have spend a little too much on drinks, but I guess it’s ok once in a long while to be doing so.

Shall end the post now, I’ll continue working harder to finish paying off my poly loan debt.

开心的时光总是不知不觉地过去了,我还是要会到平日努力挣钱了,加油韵!!!

0317HRS, Local Time, SG

It’s like 3.17am right now as I’m typing this post but still, I need to clear my thoughts and probably rant a little.

There’s quite a few movement and changes lately and I’m having some difficult time to adapt, especially in Bikini Bar, the main part time job that I’m working, I don’t know how long am I going to last there. I know I managed to stay on for 7months already, thanks to the lovely girls, I probably wouldn’t have stayed in a F&B place for long (usually). There’s been a few changes and movements in the position holders and meant that there is bound to be difference in standards and management. I felt stress. More stress than before. Maybe I’m not suited for a front-line sort of job and is better at back-of-house job…

I really can’t handle myself well enough to be able deal with customer right after 1 sec when you’ve just got scolded by someone. If it was like back in housekeeping, I’ll probably had more time to cool myself off but for a front line job, you just gotta suck it up and SMILE. I know I found myself several times giving excuses to head to the toilet, lock myself there for a good 3minutes, tearing and sobbing, wanting to quit. Then again, I had to tell myself to stay strong, endure through the day.

I feel really really tired. Not just physically but mentally. It’s mentally demanding. I lost the passion to work in F&B, lost the interest to learn something new, all I am now is thinking and battling whether should I continue the job or should I not. It did not felt like my first day where I was blur but interested to learn all the ropes to be a good bar server, but now…it’s just for the sake of money.

Work aside, working in Bikini Bar from like 3pm-11pm make my social circle upside down, made my temper from bad to worst, I have become less empathetic, less caring and very self-centred or maybe not (as per my 7 years long friend, Yunteng). I’m starting to lose all my friends that I once had, I don’t bother anymore about trying to catch up with them, I don’t bother about having friends and even if they started to distance themselves, I did not give a shit. I became more of a loner, independent person who rather hang out alone than to be with someone.

I really detest this kind of life that I am having, but I’m at a lost on what to do.

AHHH ~ ! ! !

Yun Teng’s 21st

[I know I haven’t been updating my blog for a nearly a month, mainly because I was busy with work at Bikini Bar and Buymeadrink app and also looking for new job. Also, I had a fall on the escalator and recently I injured my foot while doing a headstand without any mat against the wall (usually I use the pole for support…). Ok, maybe I did blog on my other private blog so I decided that I didn’t had extra time to update this one. Now, I’m backkk! I shall update all the overdue posts asap. Sorry >.< ]

Perhaps I haven’t introduce you guys to Yunteng, she’s also one of my secondary school classmates whom was really really close to me because she was the one that always disturb me in secondary school and oddly, her annoying actions actually drew us nearer to becoming good friends, mainly because she lives like 2 bustops away from me, so we’ll walk home together after school, ahhh…good old memories!

So, on 19th September, which was like during the F1 period (annoying road blocks…grr) she held a really fancy 21st birthday party at Kbox, with buffet spread for everyone and a 2 tier birthday cake from Pine’s Garden, you know that popular neighborhood cake shop which manage to gain fame and popularity with its Lychee Matini Cake and Blackforest Cake. Oh wells. Also, she even booked a suite in Furama Riverfront which was initially meant for the 21st celebration, but after a series of events, she changed to Kbox.

That particularly day, I was working morning shift and after which I requested to end early at 5pm and then made a dash to my staff locker to get change and made a dash to Marina Square, to get her a present. (In order to save time, I did not put make-up at all, so you should really make a mental preparation for my ghostly photos…)

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Her gorgeous 21st birthday day with Peach Melba on the top layer and my favourite Lychee Martini at the bottom tier. YUMZ!!!

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Lots of fattening cream, but damn, they were GOOD!

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The group photos which consisted like her sec school besties, poly besties and her friends from work.

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We were literally bored…so we took selfies to keep ourselves occupied, while waiting for Yunteng to take photos with us.

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Yeah! We finally manage to spam some quick selfies before the birthday girl goes off to take photos with the rest!

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With my secondary school classmates, been really a long while since we met.

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“Happy Birthday BFF, a princess for the day shall not use your hands to eat, let your humble servant for the day, feed you. Say AHHH~”

(Please don’t kill me if you read this, I totally miss being dramatic and improvising theatre lines.)

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With her colorful 21st balloons, feels like I’m 21st again! Hehehe

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All in! So there’s Yunteng’s family, and everyone else including her boyfriend hurhur!

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This was my ootd for the night. My bag was overloaded with my Bikini Bar attire and makeup stuffs.

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Back at the hotel, with Siru’s unglam photo for a headstart. HAHA

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This was the bathtub, it was really gorgeous, totally wished that I could be the one soaking in bubble bath! It has like full length glass connecting to the bedroom and that blind to provide privacy… (the blind was spoiled. Oops)

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And also an open concept basin area with big lightbulbs at the mirror, feels so hollywood dressing table area isn’t it?

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Ok, so this was my real outfit actually and it was really unintentional to be flexing my left arm, Ignore those muscles please. #poledancerarms

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Playing with her birthday balloons, hehe!

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So from like executive room to courtyard suite, this one was taken from the courtyard suite, bad lighting but I still love those wooden frames and that pool of lotus leaves, or whatever floating greens are those… ❤

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I took this photo with Siru’s iphone 6 while she was busy transferring photos to Yunteng’s laptop.

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Totally in love with these photos. ❤

I know I’m too short nor pretty enough to be a model, but this totally made my model photoshoot dreams come true. Thanks Siru!

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Taken with a timer, I totally ran like 10 times climbing up the chair and table to get like a proper shot.

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Shall end of this post with the both us!

Hope you really had an awesome 21st, and it was absolutely fun! ❤